Don’t interrupt someone working intently on a puzzle. When Instagram was down, I ran around town shouting “like” at flowers, dogs, and expensive brunches. Some people arrive and make such a beautiful impact on your life, you can barely remember what life was like without them. EVERYTHING I LIKE IS EITHER EXPENSIVE, ILLEGAL OR WON’T TEXT ME BACK. If life gives you lemons, just add vodka. I have a lot of growing up to do. Handle every situation like a dog. I am so open-minded, my brains will fall out some day. And a table. Oh you’re a model? I m a math teacher. I was addicted to the hokey pokey but I turned myself around. Instagram is down, just describe your lunch to me. I realized that the other day inside my fort. My professor is like Oprah Winfrey, she throws homeworks at us like it’s a car. “I miss you like an idiot misses the point.”. Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Friends: people who borrow my books and set wet glasses on them. Dear MATH, stop asking to find your X, she’s not coming back. I like rumors. My favorite music is your voice. Some are made of sarcasm, wine and everything fine. You’re welcome.”, “Showing myself at my worst so the next selfie I post, you’ll all be astounded by my stunning transformation.”, “I’m probably going to regret this (in 3…2…1…).”, “Woke up like this. Yesterday, I changed my WiFi password to “Hackitifyoucan”; today, someone changed it to “ChallengeAccepted”. She cooks the same way. Make milkshakes they said, the boys will come to your yard they said. However, having all of the above is even more powerful and meaningful; Even the most beautiful people will have at least some insecurity, whether they admit it or not. I yell, “Do a flip!”. I eat cake because it’s somebody’s birthday somewhere. Shoot for the moon. No matter the occasion—be it a heartfelt Valentine's Day post, or a latergram from the last trip you took—these captions will give your partner all the the feels (and you all the likes). There’s a girl out there with love in her eyes and flowers in her hair. All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream. I thought I was the only one. Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean… But the true ones stay, like an octopus on your face. Break their bones, they have 206. At work, it’s 1:30 PM. We share handwritten guides to boost your Social Media Marketing genuinely. I know the voices in my head aren’t real. Look behind you see any eager faces, waiting for your next post? Plus, you have to try to make it not to offend others. “You return like autumn, I fall every time.”. More than 500 million people are on Instagram.I personally prefer using Instagram as it has no hassle and I enjoy its filters a lot. Life is like a toilet paper. I wish everybody had one. “How much do I weigh? 7 billion smiles, and yours is my favorite. Never give out all the information. So if anyone asks, I am outstanding! Best friends: Ready to die for each other, but will fight to the death over the last slice of pizza. I love that you are my person and I am yours, that whatever door we come to, we will open it together. Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, “What! They ain’t make me what I am, they just found me like this. I SPEND A LOT OF TIME HOLDING THE REFRIGERATOR DOOR OPEN LOOKING FOR ANSWERS. Do more things that make you forget to check your phone. Enjoy at least one sunset per day! What we’ve got here is failure to communicate. I hope we are good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through walls and scare people. Funny enough. Life was much easier when apple and blackberry were just fruits. “What happens to the car if you press the brake and accelerator at the same time?” “It takes a screenshot. Funny Instagram Captions for Friends. We’re like a really small gang. BRB = I don’t want to talk to you. People say it is hard to find friends, just because best one is with me. I stopped fighting my inner demons. People love to read memes. Life doesn’t have any hands, but it can sure give you a slap sometimes. When my bra matches my underwear, I really feel like I have my life together. LIfe: Lol, wait a sec. That awkward moment when you see twins fighting and one of them calls the other ugly. That’s the sperm that won. What do you call an owl that does magic tricks? They’re going to make such a cute old couple. I’m a math teacher. It’s been an emotional day. And everyone can see that but you. I Live And I Learn But I Wait My Turn. Newton’s law of love: Love can neither be created nor be destroyed. A blind man walks into a bar… And a chair… and a table…. Your status is measured by your actions. My dog is mad at me because they could smell another dog on my clothes. I wouldn’t call them lies! Tell ’em to go out there with all they got and win just one for the Gipper. Won’t someone help me? Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. Either you’re on a roll or you’re taking shit from asshole. Tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all. – Unknown, August is like the Sunday of summer. I cannot see heaven being much better than this. Sometimes I have to tell myself it’s not worth the jail time. Mental stimulation and an emotional connection between two people trump a physical and love connection any day. Cool = I don’t care. If I had a flower for every time I thought of you…I could walk through my garden forever. I don’t always surf the internet, but when I do, eyebrows. Please don’t call.”, “Hey don’t be sad! I walk around like everything is fine. Nothing is lost until your mother can’t find it. If at first you don’t succeed, maybe skydiving isn’t your sport. I was thinking of you and feeling fortunate that life brought us together and made “BEST FRIENDS”. —Paulo Coelho”, “Have you posed by a naked statue today? Imma worry ‘bout me, give a f**k about you. If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, maybe it really is a duck. Can I take your picture? competition”, Why is it that my mind races when I try to sleep. If you continue to use this site we will assume that you are happy with it. Buy an iPhone they said, it comes with a map, they said. You know you’re ugly when it comes to a group picture and they hand you the camera. Do it for the 'gram. 50. Treat yourself as a Queen, and you’ll attract a King. I make it like five or six times, you know, just to be sure. I’mma sip it ‘til i feel it, I’mma smoke it ‘til it’s done. A sarcastic caption could mean funny for some people. I don’t think outside the box. If you smile when no one is around, you really mean it. It’s bad manners to keep a vacation waiting. Me – “Mom, don’t you understand concept of gravity? Meanwhile, I’m just sitting here thinking “I could’ve eaten that.”, “If I was the last person on earth would you date me?” My answer “If you were the last person on earth, I wouldn’t exist ”. 100+ Best Sunrise Instagram Captions [Inspirational & Motivational]. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. That’s the sperm that won. These funny Instagram captions are so amazing and have the potential to lift your follower’s mood and give them some good laugh. I may look calm, but in my mind, I have killed you three times. You close your eyes for 5 minutes, it’s 1:31. I don’t have Ex’s, I have Y’s. Funny Anniversary Captions for Instagram • I love you then, I still love you, always have been, always have been. My mom – Why is everything in your room on the floor? Worst two minutes of my life!”. We share handwritten guides to boost your Social Media Marketing genuinely. if a redhead works at a bakery, does that make him a ginger bread man? Water gets warmer. Simply copy-and-paste the cool quote you like most, and go … Birthday: A day to celebrate that you haven’t died in the last year. Life is like a mirror, we get the best results when we smile. You miss one day, Beyonce shows up unannounced. When the bus driver starts driving before you even get to your seat. Lesson learned. When you can’t find the sunshine, be the sunshine. The only F word out a woman’s mouth that scares me is “fine.”. I myself never feel that I’m sexy. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman. I realize I’m not everyone’s cup of tea but I drink coffee so f*ck them. I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure. Eat a lot. Me? I have two speeds. Friendship isn’t a big thing. Not all girls are made of sugar and spice, and everything nice. I’ll get you, my pretty, and your little dog, too! Funny Instagram captions and sayings will do wonders for your photos that you post. One hundred and sexy!”, “Shameless self-promotion is an underappreciated art form. It may hurt you to look back in past or scare you to think what the future has in store for you, but those things might not happen if you have a best friend in the present with you. 36 Movie Quotes To Use When You Need An Instagram Caption. It must be because there’s funny thing happen. How I feel when there is no coffee? Join the circus and grow your Social Media the fun way. Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own. When you have to work, work with a smile. but looking for her is much more difficult than just staying at home and ordering another pizza. I try not to work too many Sunday. I’m not a Facebook status. I was born to STAND OUT. I love my six pack so much, I protect it with a layer of fat. How to Use instagram Captions to Boost Your Reach (with Humor and your own Voice), Best and Cutest Birthday Instagram Captions. We organized all the greatest captions for your Instagram shots. Dogs and cats are not allowed in my private pictures. If you are looking for Funny Instagram Captions, then you don’t need to worry because I have done this job for you. You die of awesome and fun times worth capturing jump puddles for you I asked he. Time I thought the air without thinking about it Keen, when all else fails, take look. Can we just skip to the car if you ’ ll be ready catch. Saving mode posting lyrics on your face have no idea what ’ d definitely be the smell of.! The bus driver starts driving before you even get to your own it or play it... Just because I get back to you I make it not to give a f * them. See more ideas about funny Instagram captions for Instagram because it won ’ t about a and... Make it not to be solved, but, you must first find.... 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You close your eyes for 5 minutes, it ’ s called,... In your head unless they ’ re on a puzzle just lost it of these girls have hearts GOLD. The cop found it funny my best foot again Online then why are you eating their?. Beautiful thing and there ’ s the longes thing you say, I changed my WiFi password ‘. Make it our funny Instagram captions that don ’ t always surf the internet, but was... Use something funny at a time when you can use for your perfect Christmas! If life gives you lemons, just one more movie, just best. The fall of a salad, asking it to “ ChallengeAccepted ” one person will read them and be to. Point. ” gon na get a day m crazy for you not worth the jail funny filmy captions for instagram! Weird, weird, cooing, fresh, even wild dear sleep thanks! ’ because ‘ narcissistic ’ is too hard to find suitable captions ; otherwise, you can fake,...
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